My "Bucket List"

On tonight's episode of The Simpsons Homer convinces his family to buy a hot tub. All five of the Simpsons spend the entire weekend relaxing in the hot tub and completely forget that Grandpa Simpson was expecting them at the retirement home's family day. Watching Grandpa cry when his family wasn't there for the wheel barrow race was probably funny to most watchers. To those of us with family actually living at a nursing home, it wasn't.

Homer and Marge made it up to Grandpa Simpson by taking him to Ireland to return to the pub he frequented as a young man. Returning to this pub was an item on Grandpa's "bucket list" --- his list of things he wants to do before he dies.

I'm not as old as Grandpa Simpson, but do have a strong desire to do some of those things that I've always wanted to do while young enough to fully enjoy them. At the same time, I feel guilty about "spending a weekend in the hot tub" when my mom is counting on family visits. I love traveling for my BER seminars and my mom is supportive and proud of that work. If the week I am out of town, however, also ends up being the week that her laundry goes missing or her roommate has a tantrum she needs family support and I feel guilty. The guilt is worse when I'm not able to visit for a completely fun reason.

Ken and I have a wonderful and completely fun reason for being out of town. We have an opportunity to stay in a private home in Paris for free and have enough miles to travel to Paris for free, so we are going to do something that has been on my "bucket list" since I was last in Paris in 1973. I vowed then that I would get back to Paris someday with someone I love. Well, early June will be that time! This will be our 30th anniversary treat.

It's important to be there for my mom's needs, but our needs are just as important. So, between now and then, I will make this my mantra. "I will not feel guilty. I will not feel guilty."

Actually, I will have to learn how to say that expression en francais!