Letting Go

My cousin writes of the highly difficult and emotional trip to take his only son to college at USC last week. His wife is still recovering from her horrific car accident in June and, so, Steve handled this major rite of passage alone.

In writing words of commiseration to Steve I was reminded of how the "lettings go" are such a part of life. I remember thinking that I wanted to somehow freeze those pre-school years because I knew that I'd have to "turn the boys over to the system" when they began kindergarten. There was the first time they went to a friend house alone. There was the first sleep-over, the first week at camp, David's high school summer in Spain---all sorts of small lettings go before college. Since both boys went to college nearby, that wasn't too big a deal.

Then David got married and Kevin went to grad school in Boston....in the same month.

Don't get me wrong. Both of the above events were wonderful and we were thrilled....but in 2006 David and Kevin were officially adults and officially independent and it's thrilling to watch them make their decisions and make their marks on the world.

The Mom in me, however, still lurks. Kevin flew to Miami for an audition today. I couldn't help myself! I still had to ask if he had his wallet and cell phone, did he remember his dress shoes, did he have cash, was his hotel in a safe neighborhood....

Of course Kevin knows how to pack and plan a trip, but he patiently answered me.

He knows he still has a mom who has a hard time letting go and I hope he is secretly a bit happy about that.